Sex.Love.Power.: The intimacy podcast for powerful women & those who love them

Too Nice: The Doormat-Bulldog Cycle in Relationship

February 25, 2021 Michele Lisenbury Christensen Season 1 Episode 25
Sex.Love.Power.: The intimacy podcast for powerful women & those who love them
Too Nice: The Doormat-Bulldog Cycle in Relationship
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Sex.Love.Power.: The intimacy podcast for powerful women & those who love them
Too Nice: The Doormat-Bulldog Cycle in Relationship
Feb 25, 2021 Season 1 Episode 25
Michele Lisenbury Christensen

If you or your partner is nice, nice, nice, almost toooo nice… and then periodically explodes with out-of-the-blue anger, this episode is for you.  

Or if the person doesn’t ever explode, but there’s a way their nice-nice-niceness doesn’t feel quite authentic, or seems forced… We’re going to talk about that, too.

The dynamics we’re discussing today … I get it.  You’re not alone!  AND today’s episode will help, because I’m breakin’ it all down:

  • How leadership was the first place I saw and named this dynamic, and what I’ve learned about its roots since that time more than 15 years ago
  • What drives this seesaw between being over-accommodating in one extreme and being harsh, critical, or aggressive in the other
  • How trauma reactions relate to the doormat stance and the bulldog position alike
  • How - in the next episode - I'll share how to root out these patterns in yourself and ask for your partner to excavate them if you see them in your relationship

Full shownotes are at http://lisenbury.com/episode/025.

Show Notes

If you or your partner is nice, nice, nice, almost toooo nice… and then periodically explodes with out-of-the-blue anger, this episode is for you.  

Or if the person doesn’t ever explode, but there’s a way their nice-nice-niceness doesn’t feel quite authentic, or seems forced… We’re going to talk about that, too.

The dynamics we’re discussing today … I get it.  You’re not alone!  AND today’s episode will help, because I’m breakin’ it all down:

  • How leadership was the first place I saw and named this dynamic, and what I’ve learned about its roots since that time more than 15 years ago
  • What drives this seesaw between being over-accommodating in one extreme and being harsh, critical, or aggressive in the other
  • How trauma reactions relate to the doormat stance and the bulldog position alike
  • How - in the next episode - I'll share how to root out these patterns in yourself and ask for your partner to excavate them if you see them in your relationship

Full shownotes are at http://lisenbury.com/episode/025.